THE PHASE WHEN THERE'S LESS DRAMA, MORE STRESS, AND YOUR VERY BUSY TEENAGER ANSWERS ALL YOUR QUESTIONS WITH, "JUST TRUST ME."
YOUR TEEN MAY IMPRESS YOU
The rapid influx of hormones has regulated, the fight for peer acceptance has subsided, and the intensity of conflict over independence... well, they've worn you down. You may begin to see glimpses of rationality as your teen finds their voice, fills their calendar, and accomplishes surprising things.
"ACCOMPLISH" IS THE WORD FOR THIS PHASE
Year-11 teenagers often take on TAFE courses, volunteer activities, leadership roles, ATAR prep, or an apprenticeship. Whether your teem is caught up in the race to win, or simply trying to survive, year 11 is filled with pressure. Navigating all of this pressure is your teen's major accomplishment.
IT CAN BE HARD TO KEEP UP
Actually, they don't expect you to keep up. What they really want is for you to trust them. After all, they will be out of the house soon, and you will have to trust them anyway. Let this be a practice year for both of you. Help them prove the ways they can be trusted, choose your battles wisely, and parent them in the areas that seem to be most challenging for them personally.
Your year 11 teenager is ready to live the life they feel they were born to live - and they don't want to wait to get started. Two years is too long! Actually, next semester feels like forever in the future. Your teenager is ready to do something, right now. Mobilise their potential by listening, guiding, and encouraging their self-expression.
THINKS LIKE AN PHILOSOPHER
You help them learn when you... ASK QUESTIONS.
WANTS TO KNOW "HOW CAN I MATTER?"
You capture their heart when you ... REFINE THEIR SKILLS.
IS MOTIVATED BY FREEDOM
You coach their moral abilities when you ... ENCOURAGE THEM TO SERVE OTHERS.
THIS YEAR YOU WILL 'FUEL PASSION' SO THEY WILL KEEP PURSUING AUTHENTIC FAITH AND DISCOVER A PERSONAL MISSION
In this phase when your year-11 teenager is asking, "How can I matter?" A faith community can help them find significance by giving them opportunities to give, serve, and love others. Your year-11 teenager will never get over seeing how Gd can work through them in meaningful ways. Encourage their personal faith journey by having conversations at home.
SAY THINGS LIKE :
"HOW CAN I PRAY FOR YOU TODAY/THIS WEEK?"
"THERE'S NOTHING YOU WILL EVER DO THAT COULD MAKE GOD STOP LOVING YOU"
"LATELY, I'M FINDING I CONNECT BEST WITH GOD WHEN I'M..."
"WHEN DO YOU FEEL CLOSEST TO GOD?"
"WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT CHURCH/YOUTH GROUP?"
"ARE THERE WAYS YOU WOULD WANT TO SERVE IN OUR CHURCH OR COMMUNITY?"
YOUR YEAR-11 TEENAGER IS CHANGING
PHYSICALLY
- Has difficulty falling asleep before 11pm (it's biological)
- Needs nine hours of sleep and one hour of exercise per day
- Girls have likely reached adult height and body development
- Guys may continue to grow in height, and develop muscle mass, body and facial hair
MENTALLY
- Can be insightful and incisive about complex issues
- Wired for risk-taking
- Highly self-aware; may think, "Everybody's watching me"
- Tends to be opportunistic and idealistic
- Struggles with long-term thinking
- More capable of grasping paradox, hyperbole, innuendo, and satire
SOCIALLY
- Dating relationships may become more "committed"
- Increased interest in sexual expression (54% of year 11 teenagers report being sexually active)
- Cares deeply about issues like control, responsibility, and freedom (both personally and globally)
- Tends to be self-focused, busy and unavailable
EMOTIONALLY
- Values humour as a positive point of connection
- Becoming more at ease with who they are; may become more honest than in previous phases
- Often takes on more than they can handle
- May struggle with regulating emotions and social control
